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Questions to Ask Before Saying I Do

Marriage is a beautiful thing; made from heaven, no doubts. But the biggest mistake one can make in life is to marry the wrong person for the wrong reasons.

Marriage is not a day job. It’s for life,  but most people are more concerned with the wedding and not the marriage. The wedding is a day enjoyment and afterwards, you enter into a life time journey.

As a result of the high rate of divorce recently, I decided to jot down a few questions you may need to consider before saying I do.

Are we compatible?

Compatibility is you having a similar opinion with your partner. Before that “I do” stage, , you have to take the time to consider your compatibility level with your partner. Questions like: do we believe in the same God, do we have the same view about marriage, career, wealth, child-bearing, etc. You have to be able to give a concrete percentage of your view and that of your partner concerning key issues. The compatibility also includes your health status i.e, genotype, don’t marry someone that his genotype doesn’t complement yours so as not to put innocent children through hell.

Do we respect ourselves?

Respect is very important in every relationship, and as the popular saying goes, “respect is reciprocal”. Ask yourself if you respect your partner, and this shouldn’t be based on age. Ask yourself if you can respect your partner even if you were agemates. Any relationship that is based on respect tends to last longer because your partner will not want to hurt your feelings and you will want to reciprocate that. Respect must be mutual.

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Do I have the needed information about his/her background?

If you belong to the school of thought of when I get married, it will be me and my partner alone, my dear you are missing it big time. Marriage is not just a bond between two people; it includes the parties’ families, to an extent though. So before saying I do, you have to take your time to do a proper background check on your partner- family health history, religion, cases with family marriage, tradition, etc.

Financial status?

Do you belong to the school of thought that have it that money matters not in marriage? Hmm, my dear, you need to have a rethink o, money has a vital place in marriage because the lack of money brings about insult from both sides. Not that I am not saying your partner has to be Dangote or Otedola, but my dear your partner must be comfortable. Don’t say I do because you feel you are running out of eggs as a woman, but be sure, your husband can provide you with the basic things of life like shelter, clothing, food, etc.

Are you ready?

I know you will be thinking why the questions , but my dear this question is more important than any other questions you can think of when you are about to say I do. Some people aren’t ready for marriage but are so ready for the wedding, wedding is a day trip while marriage is everlasting, and till death do you part. Ask yourself if you are ready to submit to someone, give birth, do chores, etc. you have a right to get married when you are ready.

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Don’t let yourself be pushed into marriage,  and then later gnash your teeth.

Oluwaloseyifunmi Sekoni

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